Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I have a reading level above third grade

Which are the latest interior design trends?

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

Are British people in awe when someone from the United States visits their country?

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I know who the president of Turkey really is

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Los Angeles Area Emmy Awards Nominations Revealed - Deadline

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t buy bullshit

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

The Largest Black Hole Jet Ever Found Is 3 Times the Size of the Milky Way - The Daily Galaxy

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

Adam Silver Talks NBA Expansion - Blazer's Edge

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

What factors have contributed to the decline in popularity of high fantasy books in the modern age of technology and popularity?

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I can count

Resilience may protect against psychopathic traits in people with childhood trauma - PsyPost

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

Measles case confirmed in eastern Iowa - KCRG

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

South Africa’s emotional WTC triumph: Proteas win first major cricket trophy in 27 years - AP News

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

What do you think of Tesla's Model Y coming in ninth among electric cars sales in Europe?

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

Trump's huge bill includes immediate gift for layoff-ridden Bay Area tech - SFGATE

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

The Full ‘Squid Game’ Season 3 Trailer Teases a Wild and Violent End - Gizmodo

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

Switzerland proposes forcing UBS to add $26bn in capital - Financial Times

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I actually pay taxes

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

Fred Smith, FedEx’s billionaire founder and CEO, dies at 80 - The Washington Post

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

Scientists reveal a surprising link between depression and microbes in your mouth - PsyPost

I have complete contempt for fakery

I can read

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I see through liars

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I understand how hurricane paths work

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t cotton to rapists

I have complete contempt for traitorism